Ups and Downs
It's been an emotional roller-coaster over the last 2 days.
The first news is the best piece of news this year and was nothing short of a miracle - it would rid me of a huge non-performing loan belonging to my brother, that was parked under my name. It was a mistake I made 6 years ago and one that has been a constant burden on me, financially and emotionally.
Sometimes, you make really big stupid mistakes in your life when you're young. When you don't even blink in putting your trust in a family member.
Twice in my life, I've gone down this path. Both times, incurred a great cost on my life and my relationships.
Let me repeat the old adage, which is all too true: Neither borrower, nor lender (nor guarantor) be.
I've been lucky - by a stroke of sheer luck and blessing, I've been averted from having to carry a loan for a sibling, possibly for the next 20 years. Many out there are not so lucky and would have to live with some of their mistakes for a good part of their lifetime.
And honestly, before yesterday's news, I had resigned myself to this fate - being punished and paying for the mistake of trust and naivety.
But maybe God has other better plans for me. Maybe the lesson has been learnt and perhaps God wants this grief and bitterness to end. Maybe God wants family ties to mend over time, as life is short. Maybe God wants me to buy a car. I don't know.
But I'm truly, truly thankful for this narrow escape. Tomorrow's looking better already.
Alhamdulillah. :)
***********************************************
The 2nd piece of news was related to the biz.
Both deals that I had looked forward to and hoped for, fell through. I'm disappointed - but I'm quite sure I'll bounce back to fight another day. Probably tomorrow.
It's a temporary setback - and I'm not done trying yet.
It ain't over till the fat lady sings. And I don't know any fat ladies. ;)
***********************************************
Overall, on a balance of things, life still feels more up than down.
And whatever happens, I'm still making the Big Trip. There are journeys that you simply have to make, no matter where you are in your life.
If you have a map, a compass and you know where north is, you're not lost - you're just deciding where to go - and when.
The first news is the best piece of news this year and was nothing short of a miracle - it would rid me of a huge non-performing loan belonging to my brother, that was parked under my name. It was a mistake I made 6 years ago and one that has been a constant burden on me, financially and emotionally.
Sometimes, you make really big stupid mistakes in your life when you're young. When you don't even blink in putting your trust in a family member.
Twice in my life, I've gone down this path. Both times, incurred a great cost on my life and my relationships.
Let me repeat the old adage, which is all too true: Neither borrower, nor lender (nor guarantor) be.
I've been lucky - by a stroke of sheer luck and blessing, I've been averted from having to carry a loan for a sibling, possibly for the next 20 years. Many out there are not so lucky and would have to live with some of their mistakes for a good part of their lifetime.
And honestly, before yesterday's news, I had resigned myself to this fate - being punished and paying for the mistake of trust and naivety.
But maybe God has other better plans for me. Maybe the lesson has been learnt and perhaps God wants this grief and bitterness to end. Maybe God wants family ties to mend over time, as life is short. Maybe God wants me to buy a car. I don't know.
But I'm truly, truly thankful for this narrow escape. Tomorrow's looking better already.
Alhamdulillah. :)
***********************************************
The 2nd piece of news was related to the biz.
Both deals that I had looked forward to and hoped for, fell through. I'm disappointed - but I'm quite sure I'll bounce back to fight another day. Probably tomorrow.
It's a temporary setback - and I'm not done trying yet.
It ain't over till the fat lady sings. And I don't know any fat ladies. ;)
***********************************************
Overall, on a balance of things, life still feels more up than down.
And whatever happens, I'm still making the Big Trip. There are journeys that you simply have to make, no matter where you are in your life.
If you have a map, a compass and you know where north is, you're not lost - you're just deciding where to go - and when.
posted by Stingrayz | 1:56 AM
9 Comments:
God definitely has better plans for you, in fact for all of us, and it is up to us on how we count our blessings :)
I pray for your better tomorrows :)
dear count,
Mat Bond dah saya tonton berkali-kali.
the Almighty giving you some space to breathe becos of a recent good deed(s)?
or testing your faith, will you be thankful for the good news and continue with your plan to be a better person, or detour...
Anonymous:
Thank you for your kind wishes and prayers. :)
Dame Rosse:
I don't know why the space is given really, but I'm very thankful for the good parts.
And even though I don't know how fast or slow the "back to basics" journey will be - but there will be no detour, InsyaAllah.
There are promises that I have to keep.
Re fat ladies ... yes you do know one! :-) Moi! Fortunately for you, I'm tone deaf and can't sing!
Xena:
Please lah,...you're not fat now, woman.
But you're not tone deaf - I know, because of all the comments you make during Akademi Fantasia. ;)
There you go being elegant again! I am not fat NOW! Ok, ok ... one must face facts after all. Heh heh!
Come on, I can't be a politician either but that does not stop me from commenting on what our politicians say or do!
Xena:
Haha! Sorry, if I'm not elegant enough, dear. ;)
Who says you can't be a politician? There are so many good politicians in Wanita and Puteri UMNO from that SCHOOL of yours.
Glad to hear of your "escape" from the clutches of that non-performing loan-much a lesson to be learnt for the rest of us who may unwittingly/wittingly fall/have fallen under the same fate....
Sorry to hear of your deals that fell through, may tomorrow bring better things your way. Maybe countlessfolds better? Pray so.
Good luck with the car too.
Best always.
the cat that eats no fish:
Yep, hopefully countless folds better. Thanks for your kind wishes and prayers, dear. :)
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