Goodbye, Home
The deed is done. Today, I negotiated the best price possible for the family pesaka home (considering the circumstances surrounding the sale).
It was about RM110K lower than what we first expected, although according to my real estate agent, it's only about RM60K lower than what the house is expected to fetch, even in one year. He thought that overall, considering the circumstances, I negotiated a good sale price.
I took very little comfort in that. I wish we could have taken more time - but circumstances surrounding Abang's financial condition, does not permit.
After the deal was struck - the significance of what was happening, dawned on me. I was selling the family home. The only home I ever knew.
This is the only family house I've known or been in, all my life. This was the house I grew up in. This was where all my baby photos were taken - what few of it, I have. This is the home where I first learnt to ride a bicycle. This is the house that my mother took so much pride in decorating - the place where she entertained her friends (and mine too over Raya open houses), with her amazing culinary skills.
This is the home where I played my first game of chess. This is the home that housed the weddings of 3 members, of my immediate family - including my wedding. This is the home I used to bring my girlfriends back to, to introduce to my mother. This is the home where many of my infamous Raya open house gatherings are held.
This is the home where I had my first romantic candlelight dinner at 16, (with Vivaldi's "Four Seasons" in the background) with Lina - with chicken chop prepared by my supportive Indonesian maid, Suri. Haha!
This is the house that my late father built and designed, which originated from a typical straight-laced British house. This is the home for me in Regent's Ville - the amazing place where I grew up and acquired lifelong friends.
This is the home that used to house, so many family gatherings. This is the home where my parents lived and died. This is the house where they poured their heart and soul into.
This house is so much, a part of my identity. There are so many fond and bittersweet memories, in this house.
There are more people that know or have seen this house, than they know the inhabitants. Expressions like "So YOU live in that white house!" is always a familiar line to me. (Especially by girls - I would have been virtually unnoticeable in my first 14 years, otherwise)
And now,....we're selling it. :( And I was the one responsible in striking the deal. Me, the person who loves this house the most. Ironic.
Kak has been asking me for ages to come back to the family house and take whatever stuff I wanted. I think I've been resisting, because inside, I know it will make me much too sad, to lose this home.
Losing this home, will be the next hardest thing for me, after losing my parents. And I hate emotionally breaking down,...like I am now,...
When you lose a family home, you're not just losing a house. You're losing a part of yourself, you're losing a part of your history, your heritage,...your family. At least, the children of my siblings got to see and spend time growing up in the family house. My children will never get that privilege, of seeing the house I grew up in.
When I'm here next year, a Chinese family will be inhabiting my home. And chances are, the home will not even retain its current form. It will not look like my home, anymore.
This house, to many, marked the existence of my parents and our family in Regent's Ville. With its sale, we are erasing that mark - it will be as if, we were never there,....I wonder whether in a few years, anyone will remember that we were ever here.
Thank you, God, for the blessed last 32 years, in this home. It has served us well and it will always be a part of who we are, in our living memories.
Goodbye, Home. You will be missed. :(
It was about RM110K lower than what we first expected, although according to my real estate agent, it's only about RM60K lower than what the house is expected to fetch, even in one year. He thought that overall, considering the circumstances, I negotiated a good sale price.
I took very little comfort in that. I wish we could have taken more time - but circumstances surrounding Abang's financial condition, does not permit.
After the deal was struck - the significance of what was happening, dawned on me. I was selling the family home. The only home I ever knew.
This is the only family house I've known or been in, all my life. This was the house I grew up in. This was where all my baby photos were taken - what few of it, I have. This is the home where I first learnt to ride a bicycle. This is the house that my mother took so much pride in decorating - the place where she entertained her friends (and mine too over Raya open houses), with her amazing culinary skills.
This is the home where I played my first game of chess. This is the home that housed the weddings of 3 members, of my immediate family - including my wedding. This is the home I used to bring my girlfriends back to, to introduce to my mother. This is the home where many of my infamous Raya open house gatherings are held.
This is the home where I had my first romantic candlelight dinner at 16, (with Vivaldi's "Four Seasons" in the background) with Lina - with chicken chop prepared by my supportive Indonesian maid, Suri. Haha!
This is the house that my late father built and designed, which originated from a typical straight-laced British house. This is the home for me in Regent's Ville - the amazing place where I grew up and acquired lifelong friends.
This is the home that used to house, so many family gatherings. This is the home where my parents lived and died. This is the house where they poured their heart and soul into.
This house is so much, a part of my identity. There are so many fond and bittersweet memories, in this house.
There are more people that know or have seen this house, than they know the inhabitants. Expressions like "So YOU live in that white house!" is always a familiar line to me. (Especially by girls - I would have been virtually unnoticeable in my first 14 years, otherwise)
And now,....we're selling it. :( And I was the one responsible in striking the deal. Me, the person who loves this house the most. Ironic.
Kak has been asking me for ages to come back to the family house and take whatever stuff I wanted. I think I've been resisting, because inside, I know it will make me much too sad, to lose this home.
Losing this home, will be the next hardest thing for me, after losing my parents. And I hate emotionally breaking down,...like I am now,...
When you lose a family home, you're not just losing a house. You're losing a part of yourself, you're losing a part of your history, your heritage,...your family. At least, the children of my siblings got to see and spend time growing up in the family house. My children will never get that privilege, of seeing the house I grew up in.
When I'm here next year, a Chinese family will be inhabiting my home. And chances are, the home will not even retain its current form. It will not look like my home, anymore.
This house, to many, marked the existence of my parents and our family in Regent's Ville. With its sale, we are erasing that mark - it will be as if, we were never there,....I wonder whether in a few years, anyone will remember that we were ever here.
Thank you, God, for the blessed last 32 years, in this home. It has served us well and it will always be a part of who we are, in our living memories.
Goodbye, Home. You will be missed. :(
posted by Stingrayz | 3:58 PM
11 Comments:
Ray dear (I'm actually reading your blog today!!) Remember what I said before... take comfort in the fact that no one can take your memories away from you. Physical structures may come and go but all your experiences there will remain. Having said that, even I am a trifle sad about it. :-(
i feel for ya bro... my parents are selling the house we spent more than a decade growing up in... i shall write a similar ode of farewell to my house one of these days.. i can totally relate to the nostalgia in this post...
Stingray, I am spellbound by your writing on this post.
my heart goes out to you - it is not easy giving something of yuo away.
Have faith, be strong. It takes great courage to do what you do.
hugs bro... i'm sad abt it too. almost one yr exactly from the last open house we shared together... :(
Xena:
Everything inside the family house reminds me of Mum. Everything. This house is her signature, for all that she loved. :(
Thinktankgal:
Yes, there's been a lot of memories in 32 years. And some are irreplaceable.
You have a good weekend too, girl. :)
Marina:
Sorry to hear about your house. :(
Maybe we should set up a "Kelab Yatim Rumah". ;)
Inconditus:
Welcome to the blog! Thanks for your heartfelt sympathy.
Anonymous:
Thanks. I'm still praying that life will make some sense on hindsight - just to make it worth this pain.
Pseudonym0us:
Thanks. You now have my approval for the Gandhi sandals. ;)
Sharizal:
Yes, that was the LAST Open house in that glorious house. Thanks for sharing it with me. :)
Too bad ur 4U2C girl, will never get a chance to see the house, huh? ;)
Oh ray...
*hugs*
Voice:
Thanks, dear. :)
Minamona:
Yes, am glad that you and beau could be there for that last Raya too. :)
And yes, it is quite the landmark, isn't it? I can't imagine passing by the main road in Regent's Ville and not seeing it, as it is. :(
Hard as it may be, we all have to let go of certain things in life. I share your sentiments too. Had to sell of my 40-year-old beautiful family bungalow in Penang to other money-minded relatives.
Ah well... Memories, light the corners of our mind... :)
Another way of looking at it is that you are enabling (albeit at a discount) another family to create their own happy memories in the patch of land which your family used to inhabit. I guess that's always preferable than leaving a house empty and abandoned.
Anon 2
Rain:
Yes indeed, Rain. May memories light the corner of our minds. :)
Anonymous:
True enough. The truth be told, I kinda like the family that's moving in - they seem to be quite affectionate and loving people.
And I hope the place where I grew up in Regent's Ville will give their children, as much joy as I did growing up there.
And somewhere deep inside, I hope my children will be lucky as I am, in growing up in such a great neighbourhood.
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