Equilibrium Point

These last 3 weeks have been one of the most challenging periods of my life.

The toughest challenges are always the unexpected ones. And it hurts even more when it brings great disappointments with it - people who let you down in great, big ways with major mistakes that are not so easily forgiven, by many.

But I'd like to think that I've survived it so far- and I've managed to do the right thing - to take the correct steps, without fear and favour. You only know the strength of your convictions and principles, when you have to take a definite stand on your principles against a close friend.

Corruption is not only about money. It's about abuse of power. It's about the lack of process and controls, that gives the leeway for it. It's about a total disregard for the well-being of others. It's the misplaced conviction that you know better than others - therefore, it's best not to tell them anything. The theory is that - what they don't know, won't hurt them.

There are those who are corrupt and they know it. There are those who have forgotten what corruption looks like and the indignation that one feels when faced with it. The rot is complete when people accept it as part of the process - and that there should be exceptions to the law and ethics.

I have taken steps to correct things from his transgressions. I am still vastly disappointed with his actions, but I've forgiven him. Sometimes, people just do stupid things - we have to accept that.

But do better than just doing the right thing - learn to forgive, encourage, rekindle and move on, if it justifies it. It doesn't have to be a zero sum game. Admittedly, people sometimes do lose their way - get them back on the right track - and who knows? They might be your saviour next, if not others.

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But it's not easy. There's always a part of you that's always tempted to take the easy way out. But I'm glad I didn't give in to that temptation - my conscience would never have been able to live with it.

But there's something better than the ability to do the right thing, despite everything else.

Once that is done - one must have the ability to forgive, to give the remorseful and the repentant a second chance.

People forget that most better men are usually saddled with a history of mistakes that they've learned from - that's what makes them better men and leaders, eventually.

And most men who will never become better people, are those who shall never admit to their mistakes. Those who never look in the mirror because it never occured to them that they could be wrong.

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The emotional fast on romantic relationships is going well. I'm calmer now, even though things have been emotionally challenging on other fronts.

But for the first time, in a very long time - I'm at equilibrium point, with life.

There's no one else I'd rather be, at this point in time - nothing more that I'd wish I had done, in current circumstances.

Although I must admit - there are times when it's tempting to entertain the thoughts of starting all over again - in another place, on God's great earth. To just get away from it all.

To go away and to be in a place where my history (and sometimes, the darker aspects of the wrong sort of reputation) would not follow me - where I'm just an unknown stranger to most people - where there are no history of preconceived notions and where some people would give me a chance to be what I am and what I can be.

On some days, it's tempting.

But am not ready to entertain thoughts of uprooting and leaving yet - I love this country and there's still so much about it, that I would fight for.

And as long as it doesn't break me, trying to remain me and to keep hoping for better things on all fronts - I would continue being here - fighting away, as usual - in areas of life where many others have given up on (like corruption) and have resigned themselves to accept, as part of life.

As the saying goes - "For evil to win, good men only have to do nothing".

It's not evil's day to win yet - even if your impact be within a small seemingly insignificant circle, in the larger scheme of things - I pray that good people have the courage to fight off the wrong and to stop the rot at their doorstep.

Don't choose to do nothing, in the spheres of life where you can effect change. You're not as powerless, as you think.

Don't back off and wane in your spirits, even if you're in the small minority. Let evil wait another lifetime to win, while you and a few good men are around.

There are few achievements in life that will be as significant or meaningful in your life - as having the courage and integrity to do the right thing, at the right time and when it counts the most. Fight the good fight.