Mimpi Pari

"The two hardest tests on the spiritual road are the patience to wait for the right moment and the courage not to be disappointed with what we encounter"

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Location: Malaysia

Sunday, February 26, 2006

The Amazing Ride Begins

Here it is, finally. The moment I've been waiting for in the last 6 months.

We've received our first Term Sheet - a proposal for a seed investment of RM1.7 million in our company, for a certain equity stake. And we're expecting another competing offer, from another prospective institutional investor - 2 weeks from now. It's nice to have a choice.

Frankie and I, are absolutely delighted and overjoyed. :)

The last time I was this happy, was when I helped clinched RM100 million in Government funds for The Program, via The NGO. I was just 29, then.

Now I'm almost 33. The difference is, this time, it's not for the industry anymore - it's just for me and my company.

(Yes, I can see some of my friends and former colleagues nodding in approval - they've always felt that I should do things which benefit me personally, a bit more)

But it dawned upon us that we're now gradually getting out of the fundraising stage and moving into the implementation and product roll-out stage. Once the due dilligence is done and the money comes in, the work is going to pile on us, for the next 6 months.

And more after that. I've got butterflies in my tummy, already - just thinking about it.

This is it - this will be the moment of the proof of the pudding. This is the time where we show our investors that their faith in us, has not been misplaced. That it's the beginning of something new, innovative and with rapid potential of growing even bigger.

Alhamdulillah. Thank you, God for this second chance. Your Mercy and Compassion, is without limits.


But at the risk of sounding like I'm asking for too much - now all I need, is another sort of "Term Sheet" - with regards to another form of proposal. A non-business one. And it involves a lifetime of investment - of one's life. Her life. But that's an issue for another day.

Today, we celebrate this crucial step and look forward to working harder (and smarter) - for the sake of tomorrow's business success.

InsyaAllah.

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

The Stork Cometh,....

My best friend, Josh and his wife, Mrs. Prim, celebrates the birth of their first born daughter. She was born at 6.07 p.m. today and weighs 3.45 kg.

Many congratulations to you, my dearest friends.:)

Today, I share your happiness on the addition of this little bundle of joy, into your lives. May she be the source of many guises of rezeki and blessings, within your family.

And Josh - I still remember the time in a past life when our circumstances were the same and I told you that things would get better. Do you believe me now? :)

Looks like things got better faster for you, than it did for me. But then again, you so deserve it much more than I do.

And while I catch up with you, to enjoy the the same things that you have with your family - I hope you don't mind me living vicariously through you. I'm sure you'll make an excellent and doting father - as you've been always been one of the kindest and gentlest souls, I know.

And I hope your daughter will know one day, that besides her parents who love her very much, Uncle Ray will always be here for her, as her godfather or uncle figure. Maybe I can teach her to bowl, one day, huh? :)

I'm very happy for the both of you. :)

These are the best days of our youthful lives and I'm honoured to be able to share these special moments with you. These are moments that give meaning to everything else that we strive for and achieve, in our lives.

Take that camera out and put it to good use, k? :)

Friday, February 17, 2006

The Strength of A Woman/Good Enough

We were in a car, heading towards her dad's place to pick up her half-sister - to bring her to the hospital.

Her father was down with some urinary tract and bladder problems and had just gone through a major surgery.

She looked tired - her previous nights had been spent rushing him to the hospital, dealing with the tantrums of her children, suffering from lack of sleep, snapping at the the nurses who handled her father like a gunny sack, tolerating her unsympathetic and unsupportive ex-husband and dealing with several other emotional issues, which she quietly keeps inside.

The phone rang. It was one of her children, the younger boy. He was crying and sobbing on the phone - obviously unhappy at something the father had done.

She was driving and I could hear her tone of voice soften, gently soothing the child and patiently telling him to calm down. Repeatedly expressing how much she loves him, to reassure him and asking him to relate to her, what was bothering the emotional 3-year old.

I sensed a note of worry and concern in her voice - a part of her was afraid, at how the children were being treated by their father - her ex-husband. He could be a bit temperamental when tired. On top of that, the father never understood how to handle the younger boy - in her words "taking the little boy head on, is a losing equation - because he has so much more energy than you".

Only mothers can make that much sense, when dealing with children.

But she had no choice - she had to sleep over at the hospital to ensure that the nurses were not doing further damage to her father and to leave her children, at their father's place.

Managing young children in a divorced family can be a pretty tricky business - if it's not done well, you'll be unleashing traumatized adults into the world, who never quite get over the trust issues. God knows, I've had more than my fair share of encounters with them.

She hated her job and hated her idiotic boss even more, her father's in a hospital, her current romantic relationship is in some form of limbo and she's going through an emotionally trying time, she's having a hard time with her ex-husband and she's physically half-exhausted, at least. It was obvious that she hasn't had very much sleep, in the last few nights.

And yet, she patiently consoles her child on the phone - putting his needs above her own, reasoning with him and telling him that things will be better.

And at that time - all I could do was be amazed, at the strength of this woman. No matter what came her way and no matter how tired she was, she didn't buckle. And she always gave her best, to her children.

How strong this woman is, I thought to myself. How resilient and giving and enduring her love. How fortunate those who were lucky enough to receive it.

But no matter how much I used to or still feel for her, I guess I will never be that lucky. Or be good enough to receive it, no matter how hard I strived. Love conceals all the imperfections of the beloved and denies all others into the heart, regardless of the tireless efforts of the labourer of love.

The presence of love, makes you good enough. The absence of love, denies you the benchmark forever. It's not about how hard you try, sometimes.

And it's time I faced the facts,...and move on.

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

Shuffle Along,...Slowly,...

If there is one truth to observe about the Abdullah administration in Malaysia, so far - it is that, if you don't expect anything, you will not get disappointed.

Without fail, every anticipated major announcement by Pak Lah ever since after the last elections, has fallen a bit short of what the masses expected of him. Perhaps, this is a product of excessive spin-doctoring engineered by some of the Young Turks during the National Front's huge success, in last general election.

They over-hyped, we over-hoped and over-supported and the end-result is sheer disappointment, on the part of the electorate. At least, that is the consensus verdict, halfway through the Abdullah administration.

Some may give Pak Lah the benefit of the doubt and say that the 9th Malaysia Plan is not yet rolled out, so please give the man the benefit of the doubt (and I was one of those people) - but events have shown us so far, that there were ample opportunities for the Prime Minister to stamp his mark on some past and current national issues.

But Mr. Nice Guy remains, at best, a nice man and a fair leader and at worst, absolutely ineffective and not up to confronting the challenges that Malaysia, currently faces.

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As far as the recent Cabinet reshuffle is concerned - I felt that it was a major letdown.

Yes, a few ineffective Ministers were removed. And their replacements, are respectable and noteworthy leaders.

Let's start with what's great about the recent Minister reshuffle.

Datuk Mustapa Mohamad's appointment as the Minister of Higher Education is surprising, but welcome. His experience and background had always been more of an economics, finance and entrepreneur development slant - and higher education would be something new to him.

The Higher Education portfolio is a highly challenging one and I believe, will either prove the making or breaking of Dato' Mustapa's ministerial and political career.

Datuk Seri Radzi Sheikh Ahmad's appointment as Home Affairs Minister is also a good one. He's always had a good astute feel for the gaps in the laws of this country and his decisiveness and frankness on issues, will prove to be an asset to Pak Lah's Cabinet and in improving transparency and public confidence in some parts of the civil service.

Datuk Zainuddin Maidin's (or "Zam" as he is more fondly known) elevation to full Minister in the Information Ministry has sparked some mixed reactions amongst the journos & new media community. One wonders as well, the impact that Zam would have on the shape of the entertainment world, in Malaysia. Also to be noted, is that Zam is seen to be a strong Mahathir loyalist.

Some are elated to have "their own kind" as Minister and some others (especially in the new media and blogging community), fear an impending clampdown on voices which are seen to be critical of the Government's actions and mistakes. Time will tell.

Datuk Tengku Adnan Mansor's appointment to the Tourism portfolio was surprising. Personally, considering his influence in Putrajaya - I would have expected him to be appointed the FT Minister. But perhaps, he will do better than Leo Toyad did. This move is also seen as strengthening the support of former Mahathir loyalists to Pak Lah.

I'm indifferent to Datuk Azmi Khalid's appointment to the Natural Resources and Environment portfolio. I would have preferred him in the Information portfolio (and glamorous wife, Datin Normala, would have been perfect foil, for this Ministry) but it doesn't really matter.

Datuk Seri Effendi Norwawi's return as Minister in the PM's Department, is not surprising considering developments in Sarawak politics and where Datuk Adenan Satem is the clear front-runner to take over the Chief Minister's post, soon and Leo Toyad is slated to return to the state politics fold too.

But one wonders whether Effendi's frustration with the Government machinery (which was rumoured to be one of the leading causes of why he left the Cabinet the first time round) would continue to haunt him.

He is slated to take over Dato' Mustapa's strategic and economic planning role as Minister in the PM's Department - and he will be an asset and a decisive leader - provided that he's not a reluctant Minister.

Dato' Zulhasnan Rafique's elevation to full Minister to FT Minister was not entirely surprising, as he was already Deputy Minister in the same portfolio. And being a Pak Lah loyalist, this strengthens Pak Lah's overall strength in UMNO.


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On the Deputy Minister's side, Datuk Dr Awang Adek Hussin's "promotion" to Deputy Finance Minister from Rural and Regional Development, is a good move.

Pak Lah seems to be choosing the best and most competent of people to be under him, in the Ministry of Finance - with the other Ministers being Tan Sri Nor Mohd Yackop as Minister of Finance II and Deputy Finance Minister, Dato' Dr Ng Yen Yen. And hopefully, Aang Adek's entry into MOF, will lessen the traditional "friendly" rivalry between Ministry of Finance and Bank Negara.

Datuk Liow Tong Lai's appointment as Deputy Minister of Youth and Sports is most welcome and not unexpected, either - as he is the new MCA Youth Chief.

Together with Dato' Azalina, the Minister of Youth and Sports - who is founder of and former Puteri UMNO Chief and who would still qualify to be called "youth" if she was a man - the Youth and Sports portfolio seems to have been taken over by the people from the Youth wings of Barisan. It's about time that the young be given a chance to fully govern their own age-group.

Datuk Ong Tee Keat's appointment as Deputy Minister of Higher Education is another great move. Datuk Ong is an MCA Vice-President, is fluent in at least 3 languages including Malay and together with Dato's Mustapa, should make quite a potent combination, in resolving the issues in relation to higher education.

Although, if I'm not wrong, this is his 3rd portfolio as a Deputy Minister. Perhaps, in the next round of Cabinet reshuffling - Datuk Ong should be given a full Minister status. I think he deserves it.


Ng Lip Yong's appointment to the post of Deputy Minister of International Trade and Industry, is also another good move. I've had the privilege of having a long chat with Ng Lip Yong and in my opinion, this man is the best of breed in Gerakan. He's a reformist at heart and he's aware of the changes that need to be made. This is the man to watch.


Dato' Noh Omar's move AWAY from Internal Security is a good one - but how he performs as Deputy Minister of Education, remains to be seen.

Datuk Donald Lim's transfer away from the Ministry of Information to the Ministry of Tourism, I believe, will do much to boost tourism. Tourism is just one of those portfolios that will not do, without MCA representation.

However, the Deputies in the Information portfolio has now been taken over by Chia Kwang Chye of Gerakan and Datuk Zahid Hamidi of UMNO.

What this basically means - is that the MCA has no more representation in the Information Ministry. I wonder how the MCA-owned newspapers will react going forward and whether they will be more cautious with their comments?


Another surprise appointment is Datuk Zainal Abidin Osman, who has been appointed as Deputy Minister of Rural and Regional Development. Reputed to be a bright spark from Penang, his appointment notes Pak Lah's continued personal focus on rural development and eradication of rural poverty.

Some UMNO cynics speculate that he's been put there to keep an eye on the Minister, Datuk Aziz Shamsuddin, who is reputed to be a Mahathir loyalist, one of those who had been retained in Pak Lah's Cabinet.


I'll skip the rest of the Deputy Minister appointments - because it's not really significant.

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So, that ends the good parts of the "minor" Cabinet reshuffle. What are the bad parts?

Many had expected to be Dato' Seri Rafidah to be removed. I was not one of those people. Furthermore, it has to be acknowledged that Rafidah is probably one of the most competent and experienced Cabinet Ministers around.

But yes, I did expect her to be transferred from the Ministry of International Trade and Industry, to a new Ministry. After the AP issue, some of the gaps of which are still there, a "let-off" like this, does not reflect well on the Abdullah administration.

The signal that it sends out is - it's okay for you to do funny business in Government, as long as you're highly competent and able in your job.

It's like having separate set of integrity rules for the bright and the stupid. It makes a mockery out of Pak Lah preaching about openness, transparency and accountability. Where is the courage to act, as was promised to us, during the elections? This will definitely have an effect on public opinion, of the current administration.


The performance of some other Ministers and ministries should have been reviewed and the Ministers replaced. I could count at least 5 Ministries which performance (or under-performance and/or perhaps, wastage too) should have been reviewed and at least, the Higher Education portfolio was 1 out 5, that was actually addressed.


Some Federal Ministers are much more suited to being Chief Ministers, in their own state. The clues to look out for are Ministers who run their federal level ministries like their own backyard - swift, haphazard, on a whim, without consultation and done purely to impress the Prime Minister. If you want the facts, just ask the agencies under them.

The general expectation was that Pak Lah would bring in more of the younger ones as full Ministers/Deputy Ministers/Parliamentary Secretaries and to reflect Malaysia's youthful demographics. This exprectation fell flat. The youngest of the new appointees, Datuk Liow Tong Lai, is 45 years old, albeit being the MCA Youth Chief.

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Pak Lah has mentioned that this is the team which he expects to "carry through the 9th Malaysia Plan".

My verdict and prediction after seeing the latest Cabinet assembly - which is virtually, the same team - is that this team will fall short of expectations, come 2011. Most of them have failed for the 8th Malaysia Plan, anyway. (I'm excluding the 7th Malaysia Plan, due to the economic crisis)

The world has changed and it's going faster. Other countries around us have got their political and governance fundamentals and best people together and are forging ahead, surpassing us.

We are in need of Ministers, leaders and civil servants that can run faster, too and is brave enough to make radical changes and honest enough to serve and be accountable. The same old thing, will fail us.

The recent "non-event" Cabinet reshuffle is like changing the coat of paint on the car and expecting it to go 100 kilometres per hour faster, than it previously did. It's a cosmetic effort doomed to failure, all other things being equal.

I've always wondered how Tunku Abdul Rahman, the "happy Prime Minister" had fallen out of touch with the true opinion of his own people. Close to 40 years later, I'm finding out, first hand.

Whatever it is, may God be with you, Pak Lah.

Sunday, February 12, 2006

A Reshuffle On The Cards?

The rumours of an imminent Cabinet reshuffle is getting stronger - again. But of course, it could always be another false alarm - especially if Pak Lah has not yet obtained his "inspiration".

This Cabinet reshuffle has been long-awaited as many political pundits see it as an appointment of Pak Lah's Cabinet - as opposed to the current "compromise Cabinet" he has now, many of whom are made up of the legacy stalwarts from the Mahathir days. Some of them are probably retained there, to ensure lack of divisiveness and strong support for Pak Lah in UMNO - more than any other reason.


I don't know all the Ministries within the Government (there are too many and many have been restructured and renamed) but part of my "dream team" (within the confines of what is possible, of course) for Pak Lah's Cabinet Team, would be as follows:-


Prime Minister and Minister of Home Affairs - Dato' Seri Abdullah Ahmad Badawi

Deputy Prime Minister and Minister of Science, Technology and Innovations - Dato' Seri Najib Tun Razak

Minister of Finance - Dato' Seri Hishamuddin Hussein

Minister of Education - Dato' Azalina Othman Said

Minister of Higher Education - Dato' Ong Tee Keat

Minister of International Trade and Industry - Dato' Husni Hanadzlah

Minister of Agriculture - Dato' Seri Muhyiddin Yassin

Minister of Defence - Dato' Seri Nazri Aziz

Minister of Housing and Local Government - Dato' Seri Ong Ka Ting

Minister of Transport - Dato' Seri Chan Kong Choy

Minister of Health - Dato' Chua Soi Lek

Minister of Information - Dato' Azmi Khalid

Minister of Human Resources - Dato' Seri Dr Fong Chan Onn

Minister of Rural Development - Dato' Senator Norraesah Saad

Minister of Entrepreneur and Co-Operative Development - Dato' Seri Rafidah Aziz

Minister of Energy, Communications and Water - Dato' Seri Dr. Lim Keng Yaik

Minister of Foreign Affairs - Dato' Seri Syed Hamid Albar

Minister of Tourism - Dato' Seri Shahrizat Jalil

Minister of Arts, Culture and Heritage - Dato' Seri Dr. Rais Yatim

Minister of Domestic Trade and Consumer Affairs - Dato' Dr Ng Yen Yen

Minister of Youth and Sports - Dato' Azimi Daim

Minister of Works - Dato Seri Samy Vellu

Minister of Women, Family and Social Development - Chew Mei Fun

Minister of Federal Territory - Tan Sri Koh Tsu Koon

Minister of Natural Resources and Environment - Dato' Sri Adenan Satem

Minister of Farm Industries and Commodities - Dato' Peter Chin Fah Kui

Minister in PM's Department - Dato' Mustapa Mohamad, S. Sothinathan, Datuk Abdullah Zin, Dato' Radzi Sheikh Ahmad, Dato' Shahrir Samad, Dato' Noraini Ahmad, Tengku Azlan Sultan Abu Bakar, Tan Sri Bernard Dompok, Dato' Shafie Apdal, etc.


That's my wish list for the Cabinet reshuffle. Let's see how far the deviations are from Pak Lah's actual Cabinet reshuffle. Watch this space!

Sunday, February 05, 2006

Keeping It Real

Life is feeling a little flat at the moment.

Work is going fine. Friends and social life is great. The feeling to contribute via the NGO, is slowly coming back.

Women? Well, let's just put it this way - if "Women 101" were offered as a subject in school, I would have managed an F-minus. I would have been the worst student - though not for lack of trying.

But no matter. When all else fails, there's always philosophy to keep me sane. And below are four quotes that caught my eye this week.

Enjoy!

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"The logic of worldly success rests on a fallacy: the strange error that our perfection depends on the thoughts and opinions and applause of other men! A weird life it is, indeed, to be living always in somebody else's imagination, as if that were the only place in which one could at last, become real!"

- Thomas Merton, writer and poet


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"Do not anticipate trouble or worry about what may never happen. Keep in the sunlight"

- Benjamin Franklin, American statesman

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"It is decidedly not true that "nice guys finish last," as that highly original American baseball philosopher, Leo Durocher, was once alleged to have said,...

I do not deny that many appear to have succeeded in a material way by cutting corners and manipulating associates, both in their professional and in their personal lives. But material success is possible in this world and far more satisfying when it comes without exploiting others.

The true measure of a career is to be able to be content, even proud, that you succeeded through your own endeavours without leaving a trail of casualties in your wake,...."

- Alan Greenspan, former Chairman of the USA Federal Reserve

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"I think that one of the greatest sins of character almost everybody is vulnerable to, is pride.

And we all tend to look at other people who do things we don't agree with or think are bad things and say, well, whatever is wrong with me, at least I'm not that.

And I think sometimes, we are too harsh on other people because it's like a crutch, we don't have to deal with whatever is going on in our lives. And I think it has really helped me be less judgmental and less hypocritical"

- Bill Clinton, former USA President

Friday, February 03, 2006

Legislating To Be Humane?

The recent case of the 11 Chinese men having their head shaved bald under police detention, after being arrested for mahjong gambling over Chinese New Year, really riled me up.

Most of them were senior citizens and were visibly non-threatening. They were not hardcore criminals - they were gambling over Chinese New Year (which is pretty much a done thing, with many Chinese families, over CNY) in a commercial premise. Yes, fair enough, it's against the law - but do they have to be treated like hardcore criminals and meted out a pre-trial "deterrent" act of punishment?

The reply from senior official at the relevant police headquarters said that, I quote: "shaving the heads of detainees is normal procedure. We just want them to look neat and remember, it is so that they will not return to the lock-up".

There you have it. From the horse's mouth. The Gestapo would have been proud.

Did I forget to mention that for the recent nude squats issue, there was not even a coded procedure written down anywhere? The procedure differed according to which police precinct that you ended up at and what is the "standard practice" applied there.

I'm tired of seeing the police blaming the law for acts which are indecent, inhumane or just a pure breach of the individual rights of detainees.

Just because the law says that you can do it (and we're taking a big leap here and assuming that the law DOES say so) - doesn't mean you should do it. Every case is unique and there is no one size fits all, when it comes to application of the law. To apply the law blindly in that way, may lead to many abuses and is a manifest miscarriage of justice.

If all that is needed from law enforcement officers is an automaton who will implement laws, without applying thought, consideration or discretion over the context and legality of the situation - then by God, let's have robots running our law enforcement. Why employ human beings? (Other than the fact that Robocops do not yet exist, of course)

What is happening to this society? Do we have to legislate, to teach others to be humane and compassionate? Or just purely decent (like not molesting a teenage girl in public, because she's skimpily dressed?)

Do we have to scour the law (and areas where the law has not yet covered and is currently, arbitrarily practised according to the "adat" in each police precinct) to ensure that there are no vague provisions that would leave ourselves, our wives, our siblings, our children, our friends, vulnerable to the abuse and violations meted out by those who were entrusted to protect us against such conduct?

Yes, there are many good cops out there and we thank them for their dedication in upholding the law and public peace.

But there are many "bad seeds" coming out of the woodworks and the public must be able to see that the good portion of the cops, don't condone such behaviour by their wayward counterparts - under the pretext of procedure - written, unwritten or purely imagined.

It is a great injustice to the good ones in the police force and worse still, it breeds distrust by the public, of the police force. The perception is there that cops can also be "pseudo-criminals", depending on whom you unfortunate enough to encounter.

Power exercised, without proper procedure, manners, thought and discretion and proper observation of the spirit behind the law - can be a form of tyranny against the public.

It's not right that we have to fear the police force and be afraid of being victimized in our own country - the integrity of the law will be undermined, if the perception is that, those who apply the executive arm of the law - are acting like thugs or criminals, themselves.

And it leads to a counter-reaction - one which inevitably leads everyone to either breach the law or take matters into "extra-legal" territory. Or worse still, an endless string of public commissions set up on taxpayer's money, reacting to every single abuse of power by the police.

And that is a recipe for public chaos and distrust. If the watchdogs of society have to be monitored all the time - then they're not serving their purpose!

Weed out the "bad seeds" in your force, PDRM. The public needs to have faith in the police force.